she doesn’t even know how she changed my life
i cannot fall in love with a person who does not have vices. i need someone who’s shitty, rough around the edges, slightly fucked in the head. if you’re too smooth, too good, too nice, i cannot take you on. i need someone who’s got open wounds and missing pieces, bitterness, vitriol, anger. i cannot fall in love with someone who is spotless and admirable all the way through. i need someone with an addiction, a dark side, a poisonous secret. i am corrosive and fatally flawed and i need a person who is as dirty as i am. a person who i cannot infect with my aberrance because they’re already festering with their own.
rot with me, love.
i am stretched so thin from trying to be everything at once
the party is over & they left me here
whatever happens i will find a way to be alright i always have
in light of recent events i have decided to cut back on all references to cannibalism just in case someone actually takes me seriously and decides to kill me because they think i am an undercover zombie. i assure you that any past references to homicide and/or cannibalism were purely metaphorical and i am most decidedly not secretly undead.
i hate being tired and i hate that most people only think of narcolepsy when they’re making a joke about it. this is not a fucking joke. this is my life or what’s left of it. just the idea that there are people who talk about narcolepsy and laugh, like ruined lives (my own among them) are just so fucking comical, it makes me want to…to smash skulls like piñatas and eat the gray matter inside.
i am a tornado, at the mercy of no one
there is a very real chance that i am your worst nightmare, that i am everything you are praying i am not. if you wake suddenly and find your body paralyzed, the skin cold and covered in sweat, look inside your head - i will be waiting; you will find only me. don’t be surprised when you find yourself haunted. the very fact of my existence is what makes me a threat, the reality of me so softly dangerous and impossible to ignore.
this fate chose me but i must admit i made no attempt at resistance
tonight is a good night to write about cops and hospitals and blood and the parts of my life that i don’t often speak of because they are unsettling and disgusting and would probably make people not want to talk to me
Anonymous asked: I majorly crush on you from a distance aha. Every word you write sounds like it could've come from some part of myself (except better, because your words just flow so seamlessly).. and you are incredibly beautiful. I wish I could know you inside and out, guts and all.
you’ve made me smile with this message and i do wish i knew what lovely creature this is coming from! i must admit i’ve a terribly elusive way about me, but knowing me is not impossible to do, i think. ah but you’ve made my day ♡◡♡
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